The Perfect Man


I have spent the entire day on my couch with my puppy going between watching movies on ABC Family and reading this horrid book on my kindle.. As I watch these perfect characters get the loves of their lives, I take a step back and reevaluate exactly what I want in a guy. Each man brings out a different side of me, a different longing in my heart. As I contemplate exactly what would be perfection in a man, I think of the two different ways this could be interpreted. Physically being perfect is not the same thing as being a perfect person in terms of personal traits and characteristics. I’m not a shallow woman who wants someone who is completely buff and athletic, yet I am not blind to the attractive looking man. As I sigh over the perfect traits in each character of the movies I watched today, I started a mental list of each trait I would adore. The first movie on today that I had the opportunity to watch the whole thing was Nicolas Sparks’ “A Walk To Remember” with Mandy Moore. Not only is this movie fantastic by itself, but I was brought back to my own high school years and remembering all the wonderful qualities I found in my high school sweetheart. I looked at Landon’s character as a whole and imagined myself in Jaime’s shoes. I absolutely adore that Landon didn’t take off when the sign of trouble came. He stuck by Jaime’s side and did everything he could to make her dreams come true. The fact that he is cute didn’t even come up in my brain until later in the movie, all I could think and swoon over was his ability to take on the challenge of loving someone with Lukemia. He was so sweet and gentle with her, always respecting the fact that she didn’t want anything physical. That definitely earned points in my book. The next movie that ABC Family played was “The Last Song” (another Nicolas Sparks’ novel.)Liam Hemsworth has always been a favorite of mine, looks and acting wise, however his character of Will played with my heart string as well. When Ronnie was losing her dad, he never left, took care of her little brother and became her rock. He helped her with the sea turtles and turned her life from that of crime and anger to one filled with love and helped her see that she loved her dad. He also kept pursuing her in the beginning.. which I loved! Like Landon from “A Walk to Remember”, he did not leave when troubling times came about (atleast until Ronnie told him to) and they still found their way back to each other! So I think it is safe to say that I find that important in a man.. I want someone who won’t run at the first sign of difficult times.

The third movie today was again another Nicolas Sparks novel.. “The Notebook”.  The redeeming quality I found in Noah is his ability to be goofy.. other than that I don’t find him attractive personality wise… Ryan Gosling is still extremely good looking though. Adding that quality to the list, I looked for another guy that has a sense of humor and found myself looking to Gerard Butler’s character in “The Ugly Truth” with Katherine Heigl. He is so dashingly handsome (which is not the right way to describe his character in this movie..) and I just found myself wanting to know more about his character.  Speaking of Gerard Butler, his performance in “P.S. I Love You” is absolutely heartbreaking. If I could take anything from that character, it would be that he made sure to take care of his wife, even into death.  Which brings me to the character of Jack Dawson, from “Titanic”.  Naturally, most who watch this movie swoon at the thought of Leonardo Di Caprio sweeping them off their feet. Jack Dawson brings Rose out of her shell and gives her a wake up call to the fact that she doesn’t need to live in fear of her husband and can give into her urge for adventure. I would take that trait from him. The ability to believe in someone and help them out of their shell or skewed version of what society expects of them. Someone who can teach me how to live and how fantastic life can be.  Next on my list would be Mr.Darcy from Jane Austen’s timeless classic “Pride and Prejudice”.   He is a respectable man, which I admire, but not as much as I admire the effort he made to correct all his wrong doings. It takes courage to do that and strong morals. He could have left it all alone, but he has a conscience. I would want a man who has a sense of morals and knowing what is right and what is wrong.

In “How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days”, Benjamin Berry is not exactly the quote “ideal” man to me. However, I do enjoy his ability to argue back and he is not completely passive aggressive. I would look for a man who isn’t afraid to argue back and will actually fight for his beliefs and go after the woman he loves  ( like in the end when he takes thier love fern and chases her taxi on a motorcycle!) My thoughts now move onto “My Big Fat Greek Wedding” and how Ian accepts Toula and her family, even willing to change his religion in order to be with her. This warms my heart because he is willing to put up with so much to marry her and he is so kind.

I have not only taken movies into consideration at this point, but also find that the romance novels I read have taken a toll on my image of the perfect man. As images of strong cowboys and illusive pirates enter my brain, they all generally have similar traits.. protective, strong, handsome and a way of saving the day. I realize this is quite silly to base my expectations off of, but this is always the image I have had for the man I want to someday call my own. I guess in my mind someone who is strong and protective, yet kind and wanting to be accepted by my family is something I value dearly. He would be strong and be able to argue his own side and stand up for himself, be goofy with me and want to go on adventures. Someone who will be supportive and take me by the hand saying ‘ let’s go, the world’s opinion doesn’t matter, I believe in you’ and would stick by my side through thick and thin. Maybe finding someone who is perfect is… unrealistic.

At the end of the day, I know that there truly is no such thing as perfect. Finding someone with all of these qualities would be amazing, but in the end what actually matters is love. When you love someone, their flaws don’t matter anymore and they are perfect in your eyes.  Beauty truly is in the eye of the beholder. I hope to find that again someday. I know that when I do, it will be truly magically and wonderful. I have my whole life ahead of me to find that, but for now I am content to dream and swoon over the men in movies and my books.


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